When you try to find or seek who you are, you believe that you are separate from this part of you (or else you wouldn't be trying to find anything).
You cannot find yourself out there because you are not an object, conditioned identity or anything that can be perceived by you because you are in direct experience with yourself. But as we are all One we can perceive others as mirrors and reflections of aspects of us but not the totality (like how Source wanted to experience itself so we became manifest so Source could know itself through us as unique aspects of Source).
If we are coming from the ego structure of the mind about who we are as a conditioned identity then we feed the egos belief in separation between all things, specially from who we truly are at a soul level. You may feel that you are not whole, feel that you have to constantly strive to be better and always on the seeking journey and are not enough as you are now. (Thinking that you have to get something or become something because you arn't already it).
Ultimately do not deny who you are!
The key message I want to get across is: accept and embrace who you are now! Know you are whole now, know love exists within you now, know you have a unique frequency that is a blessing to the world now, you are powerful and magical now!
Yes there may be aspects that need to be integrated more through your love and presence, perhaps there are higher states of consciousness and frequency that can be accessed by you, but those things will activate and unfold along your journey, you don't have to 'fix' or figure out everything about you now and be on the constant path of striving coming from a place of lack, non acceptance and denial of how perfect and beautiful you are now in this moment no matter what that looks like right now.
Trust you will be drawn to and become aware of that which will support you in your souls expansion and what will bring you joy, happiness, abundance, peace and so much more. You can grow without so much suffering.